I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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