I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
