I bet he comes in French.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
