She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
