I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
