Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Dicks are not precious.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
