i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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