You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
