i don't want you to think of me as your TA
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
