Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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