They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I think my moral compass just broke
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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