So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
