You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
So much rum. So many feels.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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