i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
