i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
