I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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