He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
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