Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
