i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
