Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
4 words: hood of his car
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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