I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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