Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
