My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Dicks are not precious.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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