I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize