What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
