He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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