You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
May the power of my ass compel you!!
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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