Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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