white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
