I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Randomize
