paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
