home. puking in laundry basket.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
