I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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