hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
