I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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