yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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