so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
