We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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