your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
