I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
