You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
