Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Randomize
