8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
