forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
