awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Randomize