honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
