I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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