ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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