I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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