The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Randomize